P Keip's Hype
The Hype around RIC, the Commonwealth, and other exotic locations (plus irrelevant content like "The Office")

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Son of a Mill Worker Calls it Quits in Race for President


The Son of a Mill Worker has decided to drop out of the race for the White House. He was lagging in the polls behind two other candidates and really wasn’t a threat. Expect an announcement today, possibly in front of a mill, at 1:00 EST.

The Son of a Mill Worker had previously sought the Democratic presidential nomination in the 2004 presidential election, but instead became the party’s nominee for the vice president position.

Born in South Carolina, The Son of a Mill Worker was hoping for a good showing in the Palmetto State, which recently held primaries for the Democratic and Republican parties. But it wasn’t to be. The Son of a Mill Worker could only muster 18% of the vote.

It was a clear warning sign that time was running out. The Son of a Mill Worker gave his all, but he could never take the spotlight away from the other candidates, settling for third in every state besides Iowa.

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